Daily I see suffering in people’s lives that I’ve come to call friends. Isn’t it true that in so many of our relationships there are layers that can take years to peel back in order to truly know someone? I’m learning that every person I meet has such depths beyond what I see and often the little I know of them. Their history, life story, tragedies and heartaches, triumphs and joys, lie hidden beneath…yet I am often too focused on what I see, what is easiest to focus on, what doesn’t require more attention, compassion from me.
Today I was talking with my friend Deborah. She has spent years serving others: for four years she took care of 40 plus children at the kids home and is now working with us, cooking & cleaning, to raise her three-year old daughter on her own. She is often so full of cheer, with a ready smile…but tonight her eyes looked heavy. She is so distraught that her 2 younger brothers and one sister are at school & will probably have to come home soon since she doesn’t have the money to pay their school fees. (most kids go to boarding school here) All I could think was that the weight of the world is on her shoulders tonight…is that suffering? Right now, for her, it is.
Our friend Francis is going through a really rough time right now. He’s without a job and has been trying to get by, but truly has nothing to his name. Just recently he was falsely accused for stealing some money & was put into jail for a week. Jail here is about as awful as you can imagine, worse than living on the streets! Now that he’s out, he’s daily scrounging for food and trying to figure out what to do next. He was talking with Torrie today and when she mentioned that he is ‘suffering’ right now, he said no – he’s seen the suffering of street kids in Kampala, of others struggling more than he. What a perspective to have in the midst of such impossible circumstances.
I’m constantly being slapped in the face with my affluence and selfishness. And encouraged by the generous hearts of so many I live and work beside. I’m witnessing and hearing the stories of how friend provides for friend, brother for brother, grandchild for grandmother, etc. Suffering is not endured alone, but in community…at least in some cases…and that is beauty, to me the
I’ve been reading an interesting book called Walking with the Poor. Here’s a quote I’ve been pondering:
“Poverty is the result of relationships that do not work, that are not just, that are not for life, that are not harmonious or enjoyable. Poverty is the absence of shalom in all its meaning.”
“[Shalom means] dwelling at peace with God, with self, with fellows, with nature…just relationship (living justly and experiencing justice), harmonious relationships and enjoyable relationships…belonging to an authentic and nurturing community in which one can be one’s true self and give one’s self away without becoming poor.”
Many of my friends here experience poverty on levels I’ll never, ever understand. They do live under the reality of broken relationships, a web of destruction from extorting landlords, corrupt officials and greedy family members. At the same time they experience hope and restoration through other relationships: people that are fighting for them, providing for them, journeying with them even through the valleys.
Just some thoughts I’ve had these last few days…any comments?
Suffering is so hard to be face to face with every day. Here in the States it is something that " a sad few" are dealing with- but that you normally have to be "reminded of". Not so in the "real world". It's so hard to come to terms with.
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