Amusing God

Every day there are millions of moments I could recount here, but of course that’s not feasible and this blog isn’t meant to be an all-about-jennie reality spot. So how do I decide what to share and what not to? Today it comes down to time, energy, and basically any thoughts that might be interesting or in some way comprehensible outside of my mind. Here it goes…

Sometimes I just think, what in the world am I doing here? And I think back to my dreams of being here, the last 2 years of my life focused on serving in Africa – I’m a pretty down to earth person, fairly realistic, I think. But there’s a lot about working here that is very different from what I pictured. Some examples…I had this picture of living and being within the community very quickly. Now, of course I live here & move around the community daily, but I’m talking about truly interacting, understanding, integrating myself within this culture. I’m white – there’s no way to hide that fact. And more than that, I’m western. I’m Muzungu. Here that’s means white person, but I’ve gathered it embodies a lot more depth to some people than just the color of my skin – I’m privileged, educated, rich, and think I have something to teach this people about how to live life. The poverty here is rampant, few people live in better than a mud hut and eat more than one meal a day – if you read either of the previous posts’ articles, you’ll know the malnutrition in this region is shocking. Men have multiple wives, as the more children one has, the more status. My culture, life experience and perspective is very different, to say the least. I have plenty of food to keep my stomach from growling – I have a 16th of my wardrobe from home with me & still have a clean shirt to wear every day – I can read and write – I can leave whenever I want… and I realize that I AM privileged, educated, rich and think I have something to teach this people about how to live life.

And so, the reality is that my integration into this culture isn’t simple nor is it easy. No matter how much I want to understand, I don’t. No matter how much I want to share & love, it’s probably going to have to look different than it does for me to share & love in my own culture. Yet, I can’t turn my back on who I am & where I come from…especially when my white skin has marked me and can’t be hidden nor should it be. I’ve started taking walks when I have the chance around town – greeting people as I pass & often having dozens of children running towards me to shake my hand or join my walk with laughter in their voices and a shy smile on their face. For now, this is my integration – observing, caring, praying. I’m trying to learn the language, though it is a slow process. My latest achievement, though – if you stop by I’d be happy to offer you tea: Echamite iyo edyo chaia?

Daily I get to interact with our local staff, beautiful people with hearts that are excited to see this community flourish and the people to care for their health and well-being. They are my link to the community & through their eyes I’m beginning to catch a glimpse of life here in Karamoja. They are so patient with me and my blunders, so quick to laugh and correct! I’ll introduce them to you as the weeks pass.

I’m sure that I’ll live through many disappointments as well as many unexpected joys while I’m here, but its just interesting to think on my desires to be here, to serve – they are still in me…but I’m not totally sure they are being met or fulfilled. I’m also not sure that they need to be though – maybe they were the springboard from which I had to jump from & now that I’m here God is doing what He had in mind all along. I’m just trying to live into His will, not mine, or anyone elses. This journey we’re on is so complicated & yet so simple all at once, isn’t it? Sometimes I have a feeling God just smiles in amusement (not mocking, but genuine pleasure) at how we walk through this world…like how we grin when children say silly things or experience things for the first time & try to figure out how they work. In my blunders and my determination, may He smile.




***pics are through the little opening in our front gate - children playing on the mound of sand next door***